10 Challenges That Will Change How You Think

Every single day we face challenges. Sometimes we let them get the best of us, sometimes we rise above them. Whether professionally or personally, we spend most of our days letting others challenge us but we should be challenging ourselves. Why does Karen in HR get to test our patience but we don’t? Why does hearing advice from your best friend ring more true than what you tell yourself? Why do we let other people cajole us into where we’re going when we should be the ones leading the way? Well most of us care too much about what other people think, even more so than what we think of ourselves. Putting the happiness of others ahead of our own is far too common. The best way to challenge that is to challenge ourselves. These 10 challenges will help you reflect, refocus and realign with the things that matter most to you. Depending on your risk appetite and how you feel about ‘dares,’ I challenge you to add ‘I dare you to …’ in front of each of these for an added push from your observant self. Lastly, try to connect each of these to a real life, and personally relevant, example. It’s important that we take time to reflect and apply these or similar challenges to our lives; our goals depend on it.

Stick it out, dig deeper and don’t you dare give up.

It’s easy to hang your hat when you feel defeated or overwhelmed or like things are simply not working out but I challenge you to always go back to your reason why. If you reflect on that moment and still feel doubt then perhaps change is in order BUT if you go back and feel like maybe you simply got side-tracked or lost your way or perhaps just forgot your why, dig deeper and stay. Staying is a lot harder than leaving and staying for your reason ‘why’ is what makes a champion. It’s what separates those who are fulfilled and those who will always wonder what if.

See each challenge as an opportunity to see things differently.

Speed bumps, roadblocks and missed exits are real people. Shitty metaphor or not, sometimes you have to take a detour to get to your ideal destination. This is true for your career path, relationships and even individual projects. I challenge you to see those hiccups as opportunities to see it another way, a potentially better way or a chance to understand and affirm where you are. It’s important to know when to be open and when to be direct. The delicate balance between those two traits builds great leaders. 

Do something, anything, you’re proud of each day.

Productivity means forward progression. Make a to do list and physically check things off that list daily. I’m not saying you have to complete a huge task every day BUT chipping away at a huge task by creating several mini tasks will give you a feeling of accomplishment and will motivate you to continue to the next, then the next and so on. My rule is to create one list with two sections: work and personal. These are your goals for the day. Under each you should have no more than 3 - 5 tasks depending on how big or small each are, because being honest with yourself will allow you to hold yourself accountable for completing it. Personal suggestion: I always have either reading and/or exercise under the personal section because if work tasks go to shit at least I have 2 self-rewarding tasks accomplished for the day so it’s never a waste.  

Listen to yourself. 

I can’t stress this enough. With so much outside influence coming in daily, it’s easy to get lost in someone else’s vision of you, what you think you should be or how you should be doing things. Even this article is an example of that, oh the irony. My guess is you’re reading this because you already have a lot of these answers and just needed some reassurance that you’re not alone. Here’s the thing. People will always have an opinion but keep in mind that when it comes to building a better you, YOU are the only person that matters. You have to live with the decisions you make and find peace in the answers. I challenge you to always have the loudest voice in your head. You know when something feels right - trust that. Meditate, journal, take a stroll, listen to music, whatever you do to find a moment with yourself to listen, do it; it’s the best advice. 

Check your expectations.

Communication is everything. Let’s say you’re an over-achieving, machine-like, self proclaimed workaholic (like myself) working with an observant type with a “follow the leader” mindset who likes to ease into things. Neither types are right or wrong, just different. How do you think that project (or relationship) will go if those two differing personality types don’t agree on some expectation parameters first? Bingo … not well. High expectations are rarely met and low expectations aren’t direct enough to create magic. You have to communicate your expectations. People aren’t mind-readers and let’s be honest, do we really want them to be?

Be vulnerable with yourself and others.

Vulnerability is like a curse word. It seems to offend instantly. It’s not that bad. It’s actually a beautiful thing that comes with strength and self-awareness. Allowing yourself to feel and/or show weakness, gives you the power to grow, like you’re shedding a layer of yourself and gaining experience in exchange. Just think if vulnerability wasn’t a celebrated thing, we wouldn’t have music, art or film. So I challenge you to embrace that shitty moment, that intimidating glimmer of self-doubt and accept your chance to grow in it.  

Remember most things are temporary. 

When you’re in it, it’s hard to think of the way out of it. Sometimes things can seem like a never-ending whirlwind of anxiety with no end in sight. Life events, ongoing projects, living situations, financial stress; all of these things are temporary. Albeit some incredibly painful and potentially life changing but your next step is always determined by you. If you can’t physically change something, you change your attitude about it. Fall back on what you can control. Give yourself the opportunity to be in it and learn from it. Our experiences shape our lives for the better or worse but it’s the weight we choose to give those experiences that play a part in who we are. I challenge you to look at your next shitty moment, lost job, missed opportunity, financial hardship or personal struggle as a temporary moment to gain clarity. 

Look at failures as answers.

Failure is not bad. It’s a loaded word that carries judgment often projected onto yourself. It doesn’t have to be. It can be a blessing, an end to something that you didn’t see but should’ve, a chance to evaluate what led you there. We spend so much of our time in “go-mode” that we often don’t give ourselves time to assess the real reason why we’re there in the first place. When something “fails” we are forced to examine why. Use that time wisely. Reset yourself, your intentions, your why and rev back up. Failure is not losing; it’s a series of steps to a big win. 

Find momentum in slow times.

At times, you can feel stagnant; like you’re just going through the motions, doing nothing of measure, simply waiting for the next ‘thing’ to come along. These slow times or valleys are when you build. If you’re on auto-pilot and still meeting your deadlines, then find a way to propel yourself into the next level with planning, researching or continued education. You should never stop learning. Take this time to look into metal-smithing or photography or cooking, whatever it is you’ve been interested in checking out but “don’t have the time for.” Now is the time. Inspire yourself. Creativity can be discovered in just about any outlet and be applied to all aspects of your life and career. Keep steady, even when that momentum has to come from within you.

Appreciate the struggle as much as you’d appreciate the win. 

This one is BIG. We are all guilty of showcasing the ‘best of’ moments in our lives. In short stories we share with friends, on our curated social media pages, in our career peaks and performances, but the parts we don’t often hear about is the perseverance and tenacity it takes to get there. Things that come easy, while we value them, we aren’t as emotionally invested in them. They are replaceable, negotiable, flexible. Things that require sacrifice, hardship and risk, well those wins are priceless. We spend so much time tweaking and learning that when we finally get the win, we often forget the feeling of want. Never forget the reason why you wanted it or the struggle you endured to get it or what you gave up to own it. Where you came from says everything about who you are now so appreciate it, love and cherish it. You’re always building. Don’t let the arrangement of blocks fool you into thinking that it was easy.

I’m sure if you spent some time on it, you could expand on these with some additional personal challenges and yes please do! These are for you to own and use indefinitely. The more personal they are to you, the more likely you are to remember them. Every time I find myself at a decision crossroads, in a rut or simply needing a way to validate myself, I refer back to this short list. If for nothing else but to remind myself that I am aware of my own thoughts, in control of my own outlook on life and responsible for writing my own story. Things really start to change when you realize that life doesn’t happen to you, it can happen for you.